Iquitos and Urubamba in Peru
I spent 3 weeks with this beautiful spiritual family. It’s hard to describe my experience in words but I’ll do my best. Outside of the birth of my 2 daughters this was the most profound experience of my life. Since I can remember I have struggles with feelings of self worth, at 4 I tried to hang myself with yarn from my doorknob, that was the 1st of many suicidal thoughts during my first 14 or so years. In my late 20’s/30s I hated my body, I was anorexic and then developed bulimia which put me in the hospital in 2015. It’s been 5 years since I binged and purged and even though the physical side of that disease was over the emotional/psychological side still had a hold on me…until now.
I showed up lost, hopeful, anxious and excited for the new chapter in my life. A chapter that needed to start out with feelings of love and gratitude for myself and others, my heart filled with love and the willing acceptance of help from Arkana staff, facilitators, shamans, the owner himself as well as the other spiritual warriors I met during my time there. What an amazing group of individuals that were all conspiring to make my life better than when I showed up.
The people surrounding you and participating in the ceremonies become family. There is no other way of describing it, and not a broken family, but one that was built on love first with no extraneous baggage. I made lifelong friends in just one week!
I had the pleasure of meeting some of the greatest teachers, both inside and outside of myself. In one amazing piece of magic Maestra Justina performed spiritual surgery to remove a negative energy blockage that had plagued me for sum 25+ years as chronic lower back pain. During the ceremony the energy moved from my lower back into my stomach area and was trying to “get away” from Justina. She was able to remove this blockage and my lower back pain has not returned – it’s been 3 weeks now! I knew I was in the presence of something incredible and magical and beyond understanding.
So how do I feel now? Every day I am reminded to keep my heart wide open for myself and for everyone around me, for we are all part of the divine and divinity lives within us. Our spirits are always connected and separation is only a construct of our egos, stories, and self doubt. I believe my life has changed, people say I have a glow, my children are happier than ever and I have re-learned play, happiness and creativity. Am I blissed out and unable to integrate back into a normal life – sure. But it’s not a normal life anymore, its an extraordinary one. One filled with life and love and happiness.
Thanks you Arkana, Jose, Coleman, Theo, and all the shamans and staff, you are truly special and I will never forget my re-birth and how this experience filled my heart with love and joy.
I leave you with a haiku.
Re-birth day, grateful
Re-learning play, happiness
Heart bursting with love
I’ll be back!