have always thought of myself as someone who would only be successful if I made myself follow a “life plan”. I would write myself lists of goals that I would need to achieve, places I would need to visit, money I would need to save, etc. I would prioritize all of these on a timeline, and organize it around my (pretty dull) 9-5 job and my (not so exciting) extra curriculars. Everything in my day had a time frame in which it needed to be accomplished.
One day, I met someone at my work and started to chat with them about something that I cannot even recall. The only thing I remember was thinking how boring this person was. Then it struck me, that I was JUST as boring. This fact horrified me, so I quit my job and decided to get a working Visa in the Caribbean. I moved there within the week.
When I got there, I was terrified. I had never done anything so impulsive, and I didn’t know why, but it felt like the right thing to do. Which terrified me even more. Long story short, I met some of the most amazing people there. What I loved most was how they were all so passionate; about everything they did in their day to day lives…from eating their breakfast to taking an afternoon nap. I slowly started embracing a lifestyle of less agenda, and more adventure. When one of my best friends prompted the idea of going to the jungles of Peru to learn about Ayahuasca… I only hesitated for about 20 seconds before I thought, “there’s no time like the present”. And with that mind set, I arrived at Nimea Kaya a short week later.
I shortly learned that alot of the other guests in my group all had a very wonderful, important reason to be there. Needless to say, I felt that, in comparison, I really didn’t. However, the staff and general environment of the retreat made me feel so at peace, and so at home…that it was easy enough for me to cast that idea aside for the time being. During my preparation for the first ceremony, all I remember thinking was: “whatever happens, happens. I completely surrender to whatever teachings Mother Aya has to show me. I am scared, but she knows that …and I know she will take care of me “. I dont know why I was so reassured of the fact that everything would be okay, I just was.
Not to sound too dramatic, but my life was changed within 4 nights. 4 beautiful ceremonies. In the most simple way, Mother Ayahuasca showed me three things:
1) what love is
2) how to find love within yourself
3) the best ways to reflect that love in everything I do
I never thought I would feel so at peace with myself, with those in my life (past and presently), and with anything that may come my way in the future. I’ve never felt so confident in myself to be able to trust my own heart.
With the help of Mother Ayahuasca, and the entire team at Nimea Kaya, I fell in love with humankind, with nature, with gratitude, and with myself.
I will forever thank everyone who was apart of my experience for showing me how to be the best version of myself.
Attended Nimea Kaya retreat in Pucallpa, May 2018.